I’ve finally done it. I’ve finally written the first paragraph of my birth account. It felt almost like pulling teeth, but I did it. And here it is…
Trying to get words on paper to describe this birth has been a challenge. I’ve told the barebones condensed version more times than I can remember now, but to find the words to infuse the story with all of its detail and intensity and emotion… every time I thought about making an attempt, I found myself paralyzed. My feelings about the experience seem to change daily as well. As I’ve relived it and processed it in my head over and over, the words and feelings associated with the experience have ranged across a broad spectrum—sometimes positive, sometimes a little negative, sometimes neutral. Fortunately, as the event recedes further into memory, my feelings about it grow more and more positive and peaceful.
And now I will go write some more. With a happy wrapped baby on my chest. :-)
Or maybe after I nurse said happy baby and get my other kiddos lunch… and maybe fill my own stomach while I’m at it… Someday this birth story will appear… I promise.